Relational inquiry is a lost art and no-brainer way to create more rewarding relationships, instantly!
Life is one big ongoing discovery process. We’re either forced into discovery, or we proactively choose to do it. And generally, the more we discover, the more the progress is made and the better life becomes. Uncovering the needs, wants and demands of our personal and business relationships is a simple process that should have no ending, only new beginnings. We should stay attuned the value if we employ this valuable curiosity, and take note of what happens if we move through life and relationships with without the habit of perpetual discovery in play.
The habit of non-discovery is sure to pin us into a continual state of relational aloofness, and our value to others will be minimal and inconsistent. Add to that, that we’ll often expend energy delivering “irrelevancy,” and it makes a compelling case to start getting curious.
In addition to having my own baggage, I’ve listened to hundreds of stories of personal and business relationships that have gone flat, bad, or are just gone, period, due to the absence of discovery. After every story, I’m always inclined to ask the same questions. The first of which is: “Well, what is important to them?” What I get back are blank stares, confusion, and statements like, “Who cares about them, what about me?” Once I clarify “what about me” might be the problem, I’ll inquire, “When was the last time you asked what was important to them?” Answers range from months to decades. After we determine this would be a good start, I’ll request they start discovering what’s important, then deliver on what they discover and we’ll meet in a week to see how it’s going. Other questions I request they ask the other are, “What’s missing from our relationship. What would you like me to stop doing, start doing and continue doing?” Improving relationships is a simple process of discovering needs, delivering value, measuring by results, and repeating the process with sincerity and consistency.
Discover someone’s want or need today and deliver on it.